Thursday Night Thoughts

I don’t think you are a bad mom. In fact, I think you would’ve been an amazing mom. Yea, you were young and priorities weren’t straight back then…and you were born into a naturally “poor” society. But, looking at you, there are a lot of things I would’ve done differently. Heck, you probably know what you’d have done differently too. Hindsight is always 20/20 eh? I think you are a mom born of a great series unfortunate events. These events are not ALL your fault, but they are somewhat; I’m sure you’d agree.

I’m glad I have your children. I’m glad we have you too. No, you can’t financially support us. But we know you, we know your background, we know you want better for them than what you had. I’m sad “the system” is the way you had to learn. I think often (maybe too often) of how I would’ve fought for my kids in court until my dying day. And yet you were brave enough to say “enough is enough” and sign your rights away. Everyday I’m thankful you did.

I just watched your son devour 3 tacos tonight with handfuls of tortilla chips while complaining of the pain of anything remotely spicy (yet STILL continuing to eat, mind you). And I thought, “there she is.”. No matter how old he gets, or she gets, there will be moments that I can watch them and without a doubt say “there she is again”. You’re in them, and that’s good. We are raising them, and that’s good. Because your stubbornness will get them through a lot of rough times, and our parenting will have taught them self-control and all sorts of things that compliment what you gave them.

We are how these situations should go, yet more often than not, go horribly wrong. Thank you for being the other half of the “getting along” circle. 

I’m sorry the world couldn’t save you. I’m sorry that you made the choices that you did. I’m sad that you didn’t save you sooner. I wish we had met in different circumstances. But this is life, and I didn’t create it. But I know the One who did and all I can do is just hang on and trust. Thanks for building half of the bridge of communication between us.


Warmly,
Me